Big Brother 8, Day 15: The It Girl

Your attention, please, people. Charley Uchea would like it to be known that she is the skinniest girl in the house. And the most beautiful. In fact, to hell with the false modesty - Charley can't help it if she's "a f*****g It Girl' can she? And if she can't help it, why she may as well keep on mentioning it, over and over and over again.

This time, though, Gerry has had enough, and calls Charley an attention-seeking show off.
"Why would I need to attention seek?" asks Charley incredulously.  "The attention's all on me anyway!"
It's hard to imagine anyone stupider, or more self-deluded than Charley is. In fact, it's so hard to imagine it that there are times now when I can't help wonder if she's just doing it to wind us all up - casting herself as the show-off of the house, and then living up to her own publicity. Not that the publicity is going to be good...

The housemates are given a task to find out who is the manliest contestant of all. This is pretty pointless - it's obvious that Tracey is the manliest - but somehow Carole manages to win it, possibly because the rest of the housemates are too busy shrieking and talking over one another to know what's going on. Carole is taken into the diary room and given another task - to build a shelf in seven minutes - but fails.  Never mind, Carole, at least it got you away from your housemates for seven minutes. And failure is probably a good thing at this point in the game: let's face it, the prize would probably have been alcohol, and God knows, that's the last thing this bunch needs right now.

Speaking of failure, the housemates have also managed to fail this week's shopping task, which involved lying in a tank of dead fish, while dressed as sardines. And to think this is what passes for entertainment these days.... Having failed the task, they have just £8 each to spend on this week's shopping list which, predictably, they make an absolute hash of.

Charley, of course, doesn't need food. As "the skinniest one in the house" (did you all get that Charley is the skinniest one in the house, by the way, or should she maybe repeat it a few more times? Never mind, she probably will anyway), she doesn't really eat much, she says, and anyway, "Big Brother won't let me starve, will he?" So Charley spends all her money on cigarettes. A few minutes later she's in the diary room, weeping and a wailing that she will now be "the first ever housemate to starve to death" in the house. Oh, if only...

Food still remains the biggest cause of conflict in the house (although Ziggy and Chanelle are giving it a run for its money), mostly because Nicky - "The Moany One" - has chosen to make it that way. Nicky has still yet to speak without that whine in her voice, and appears to be reveling in her own misery, starting fights with people about food and then instantly throwing up her hands and saying "I don't want to talk about it".  Nicky even manages to start a fight with Big Brother, whining about the "waste of food" in the pork pie task, and pretending to rub one of the pies in the camera's face. It's actually just as much Seany's fault as it is Nicky's, but Big Brother punishes Nicky for it anyway, probably because it's just much more satisfying to see The Moany One scrub the windows in the rain than it would be to make Seany do it. And to think she was my favouritre.

Nicky is no longer my favourite. In fact, if I absolutely had to pick a favourite, it would probably be one of the twins, who are now worried that they and Chanelle are "the only clever people in the house". Worryingly, they might actually be right.